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If Arnold and Maria were our Friends . . .


The tabloid headlines are riddled with the news of  the former Governor of California’s infidelity.  Seems he had an affair with a household employee and fathered a child who is just weeks different in age from his child with wife, Maria. While the Bible does allow for divorce in instances of adultery (Matt 5:32),  the book of Hosea, and the prophet’s redeeming love toward wayward wife, Gomer, shows that adultery does not have to lead to divorce.

Here are two resources to have on your shelf so  if someone walks into your office in marital crisis due to infidelity, you will have something available to help or refer to him/her.

When a Mate Wants Out: This is written by our mentors in ministry, Jim and Sally Conway. We keep numerous copies of this on the shelf as it is the best book to give a person the first day, or your first conversation after a spouse has uttered words like:

  • I want out
  • There is another person
  • I never loved you
  • I want a divorce

The Conways walk the betrayed person, the wounded one, through active, practical steps to give a marriage the best opportunity for survival.   

Love, Honor and Forgive: This is our most serious book for couples in crisis. It walks a person (or the couple) through the Six Steps of Forgiveness then gives more tools for reconciling. It also shows how to set boundaries, in order to give God time to work on a wayward spouse yet protect the innocent. Love, Honor and Forgive is great for couples, but it is good even if only one person is hopeful, this book will equip him or her in a way that still makes an impact on the relationship.

In coming weeks I will offer more marital helps for couples in crisis.

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